This week I’ve been inspired by the new Drake song, “In My Feelings.” If you haven’t heard it yet, I recommend you give it a listen. Aside from being a hit tune to jam out to, “In My Feelings,” got me to thinking. Too often we refer to someone as “in their feelings,” in a negative way. People “in their feelings” are seen as overly sensitive and emotional. In reality, if we ever hope to work through our emotions and move beyond them, we’ve got to get “in our feelings,” and feel the feels. I say we should all be more like Drake and get in our feelings and here’s why.
Feelings remind us that we’re human.
Chances are if you’re completely emotionless, then you’re a robot (i.e., not a human). Emotions are what make us living, breathing, human creatures. Emotions are what connect us to one another. If nothing else, you should embrace your emotions for the simple fact that they’re inevitable and not going away. Usually when we try to banish our emotions, it’s the negative ones that we’re hoping to keep at bay. But emotions are emotions, and by denying one you deny them all. Emotions can be overwhelming, but they also remind us that we’re not alone. Every other human on this earth experiences emotions. If that doesn’t provide a sense of comfort, I don’t know what will.
It helps you find the root cause of your feelings.
Aside from avoiding the inevitable, getting “in your feelings” helps you determine the root cause of what it is you’re feeling. Maybe you go through life just feeling the feels without ever wondering where those feelings are coming from. Well just as emotions are part of human nature, emotions also have a cause. If you’re feeling anxious it’s most likely because you’re nervous or afraid of something that hasn’t happened yet. Getting into your feelings gives you the chance to think about where your emotions are coming from. Once you identify the source of your emotions, you can act on them.
It can help you figure out next steps.
That brings me to my third and final point: getting into your feelings allows you to figure out a plan of action to move through your emotions. For example, maybe you’re anxious about an upcoming job interview. You’re thinking you’re going to bomb the interview and not get the job. Getting in your feelings and identifying your fear of messing up the job interview allows you to not only challenge those negative thoughts by reminding yourself how awesome you are, but it also might inspire you to do some interview preparation.
Overall, it’s not a bad thing to be in your feelings. Getting in your feelings means embracing human nature, while also allowing yourself the chance to work through your emotions and move beyond them. Next time you are in your feelings, I encourage you to reflect on the root cause of what you’re feeling and also create a plan of action to address the cause of emotions.